Recent Posts

January 28, 2022
Brick Wall

We are at the life stage where the boys come home late at night after a shift at work or a musical theater rehearsal, and then they scrounge the cupboards for evening snacks like Ramen or quesadillas. There is much talk most mornings about the rogue dishes that show up long after the kitchen is […]

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September 19, 2021
Gentlemen's Academy

Somehow, I have become the mom sitting by the mirrors outside the men's dressing room, while the sons try on jackets, pants, shirts, and vests to wear to Homecoming. More importantly, these guys have become tall enough, broad enough, and particular enough to wear clothes that require a tape measure for specificity and fit. (We […]

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June 23, 2021
What the Disney Business Model Taught Me About Parenting

  "Coming up with a new recipe to feed the family, or even putting together a presentation for a new client may not typically be thought of as creative acts, but they are. Creativity is about choices, training, experimentation, inspiration, history, commitment, and fun. Every occupation - from artist to businessperson, teacher to chef - […]

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June 22, 2021
The Naked Movie

I am writing in the library today. A mom and her little girl - probably four years old - walked by my spot near the movie section, and I heard the little girl begging her mom to get her The Naked Movie. Mom: "I'm sorry, what? I don't understand what you're asking me." Daughter: "I […]

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June 19, 2021
Thirteen Lessons I Learned from My Dad

Thirteen Things I Learned from my Dad: 1. If you're going to get in trouble at school, let it be for talking too much to all of your many friends. Sociable is not a bad thing. 2. When putting together an outfit, choose the least noticeable color in the busier item, and make that your […]

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December 25, 2020
Thank you, Mary.

I remember when each of my boys was born, the sweet relief of holding them, meeting them, beginning this new adventure with them. But I also recall the complicated emotions of sharing them now with other people.  For so many months, my baby had been mine alone.  Only I knew his movements, his stirrings, his […]

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November 15, 2020
The Great Denim Skirt Debate of 1993

Everybody who becomes an adult has to be fourteen once, and it’s a rough time of transition for everybody involved in that year of slamming bedroom doors. It’s a year of strong emotions, and manipulating heartstrings like one learning to play a violin: screeching and awkward until it becomes classy or even tolerable. Or maybe […]

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September 29, 2020
On Dating the Daughters

"Mom, I asked her to be my girlfriend. But don't worry - I talked to her dad already." "You asked her dad?" Peter and I exchanged silent glances, since "asking the dad" isn't something we had coached this young man to do. There are a few gifts born from my sons watching my own love […]

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September 24, 2020
Juggling the Glass and the Plastic

I read recently about an interview with author Nora Roberts, where someone asked her how to balance writing and kids. (Anything of this specific genre grabs my attention faster than a barista calling out the cup with my name on it.) She said the key to juggling is to know that some of the balls […]

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September 21, 2020
Raindrops, Bicycle Gears, and Morrie

Three things have happened, and they are sorting themselves into the same space of my mind, as if they belong there together. First, I sat outside during a summer evening rain shower.  The tasks of the day were finished, we were in the after-dinner space of each doing our own thing, and I was sitting […]

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September 19, 2020
Today, I Said Thank You.

Today, I said thank you to the Starbucks barista who made my Pumpkin Cream Cold Brew, even though she is complicit in my addiction.  I won't press charges as long as she keeps making that goodness that unabashedly defines autumn for my soul. Today, I said thank you to my dad, who gave me a […]

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June 5, 2020
"... but I don't know what to say."

When my family goes away for a bit, things fall to pieces. When we got on the cruise ship in March, it was still safe to travel.  When we got off the ship, the pandemic had hit, and we barely made it home.  Everything had changed.  Schools were closing, small businesses were sinking, and nobody […]

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May 18, 2020
Front Lines and Finish Lines

This is the final week of distance learning, a household term that nobody knew three months ago. This week, we go to the school to pick up what was left behind in their lockers in the Great Middle School Rapture of March 2020. One of the parents commented on the school thread: I'm so sorry […]

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May 1, 2020
So Much "Leisure Time"

Back when I was navigating the long days with little people, some researchers endeared themselves to me with a released study that indicated that stay-at-home parents have 30+ hours of leisure time each week. They implied there's no reason to complain about busyness or exhaustion, because really, most of it's leisure time. Back then, a […]

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April 23, 2020
Ranch Dressing and Orgasms

"Mom, did you know they make ranch dressing seasoning?" one son says. "I feel like she bought that already," says the other son. "No, not the dressing mix. It's in a shaker. Like parmesan cheese," says one son. "I had a bad experience with ranch dressing," says the other son. "What was it?" "Uncle Rob […]

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April 11, 2020
Our Loudest Easter Story

I wanted to send this story to you on Easter morning or the night before, but things got away from me, what with the glazed ham and the hashbrown potatoes and the early service and hosting all the family and dyeing of inappropriate eggs. (I distinctly recall saying nobody was allowed to draw penises on […]

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April 2, 2020
Jesus Didn't Parent Toddlers: A Love Letter to the Parents of Littles

Parents of Preschoolers and Toddlers, this season is the real deal, isn't it?  You are in the t-r-e-n-c-h-e-s. When my guys were preschoolers, I had to have them out the door by 9:00am, or the house would surely crumble around us.  I was sure of it, and my theory was fairly proven. And now, this […]

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March 25, 2020
The Collective Reflective

Have you noticed? We have become people who are counting. We are counting things. We are counting days. We are counting people on the walking trail. Counting people who are sick - and even sweeter, counting the people who have recovered. We have stepped into the forest, and we can literally count the trees. One […]

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March 24, 2020
Sparkly, Shiny Promises

A few years ago, I kept things lively with a special treat for the boys each day of spring break. One day, we visited the arcade with a handful of quarters for their glorious spending pleasure. Tuck spent his coins on experiences: virtual motorcycle rides and shooting galleries. Tyler spent his coins and best efforts […]

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March 10, 2020
When Love Requires Quarantine

So, this happened last week.   Eight days of cruise ship magic and wonder, evening entertainment, limeades and margaritas, karaoke and water slides, three international ports, all punctuated with an exclamation mark of a day at Disney World. So, basically, we did all the things that they say you shouldn't be doing right now. We […]

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