“I didn’t know I was being manipulated. I didn’t know the signs.” “I didn’t know the cycle of abuse, or that it’s normal to feel guilt for something that’s not your fault, to have complex emotions about your abuser as you heal. I learned that I could set boundaries, choose not to reconcile, and still pursue the internal freedom of forgiveness.” – Tricia Lott Williford
A seasoned author and masterful storyteller, Tricia Lott Williford encountered the public trauma of the death of her husband, but she held quietly the private trauma that happened at the same time: grooming, manipulation, sexual abuse, and spiritual abuse by a person of trust. Tricia and her therapist, Jana Richardson, LPC, have written a resource to help others recognize the veiled dynamics of abuse, where it starts, how it escalates, and how survivors can break free and find freedom. Peer-reviewed by mental health therapists, You Are Safe Now offers a survivor’s firsthand story of abuse in the church including
an explanation of the nature of abusers and their common tactics;
compassionate, nuanced discussion of trauma responses;
research, examples, and statistics to identify abusive dynamics, predation, grooming, and psychological manipulation; and
practical tools and resources to facilitate recovery.
For survivors of abuse, counselors, therapists, pastors who treat survivors, and those who support survivors in their healing, You Are Safe Now is an indispensable resource.
We don’t understand it. Or we’ve been hurt by people who use it. Or we want to love it, but we don’t know how. Most of us feel like we’re reading something written to somebody else.
If you’re in that place, this book is for you.
Tricia Lott Williford isn’t an Old Testament scholar, a pastor, or a Bible professor. She is a lover of messy people, a mom of two teenage boys who are perpetually hungry and often late for school; she has battled depression and anxiety to degrees that have nearly drowned her; she has begged the Lord for miracles that only he could provide; and along the path, she fell in love with God’s words. With slice-of-life stories, humor, and charm, Tricia Lott Williford will help you discover that the Bible can be your lifeline, too.
This is a book about falling in love with the Bible... that feels nothing like reading a book about the Bible. When you finish this book, you just might say, “I didn’t realize it, but I was learning while I was laughing. She stirred within me a love for the Bible, but it didn’t hurt at all.”
This Book Is for You will help you engage the Bible as a living thing that meets you where you are, in your actual life.
“There is always work to be done in the waiting. Sometimes the work is hands on and physical, and other times it is a solitary journey of soul searching. Sometimes the work is a discipline of noticing, a practice of being alert and aware; sometimes it is about being patient, loving, and present. But when we choose to surrender to the moment, when we seek to believe this moment is part of a larger story, and when we embrace the ache of the longing, the wait is never wasted.”
~ Tricia Lott Williford
I’m inviting you into the confidence conversation. It’s time to stop being unhappy with yourself. You can choose to stop second-guessing all of your decisions and commitment and wondering whether your life would be better if only you had chosen differently. I invite you to be present where you are—where God is!—and to embrace your life and live out your God-given gift of confidence.
Come join me in the pages, my friend. Let’s talk about who you are. Let’s hold hands and run hard into the glorious mess of it all. I don’t know what challenges wait for you, but this I know for sure: You Can Do This.
Praise for You Can Do This:
You Can Do This is so refreshing. With inspiring and funny stories, Tricia helps you exchange fear for faith. She leads you to a place where you can deal with the bullies who have tried to steal your confidence―the ones around you and the ones inside you. Read this book and live as the confident girl and mighty warrior who God intended you to be.
– Jennifer Dukes Lee, Author of The Happiness Dare and Love Idol
They say life doesn’t come with an instruction manual, but I think “they”―the authors of such platitudes―have yet to read You Can Do This. The wise, quirky voice of Tricia Lott Williford is the one I want to hear. I want to hear it when I don’t feel as though I’m good enough. I want to hear it when I feel afraid of what the future might hold. I want her voice in my ear when I meet someone who’s unkind. As you read You Can Do This, listen for the gentle voice of God’s life-giving Spirit breathing through the words on each page.
– Margot Starbuck, Author of Small Things with Great Love
“Now I know that every single day, the best and the worst, only lasts for twenty-four hours.” —Tricia Lott Williford, And Life Comes Back
When your life falls apart—through a death, a lost relationship, a diagnosis—you want more than anything to know that your pain has a purpose. And that beyond your pain, a new day awaits.
Tricia Lott Williford discovered this in a few tragic hours when her thirty-five-year-old husband died unexpectedly. In And Life Comes Back, she writes with soaring prose about her tender, brave journey as a widow with two young boys in the agonizing days and months that followed his death.
And Life Comes Back documents the tenacity of love, the exquisite transience of each moment, and the laughter that comes even in loss. This traveler’s guide to finding new life after setbacks offers no easy answers or glib spiritual maxims but instead draws you into your own story and the hope that waits for you even now.
Praise for And Life Comes Back:
“Tricia Lott Williford’s book reminds us it often takes a thick darkness to make known the light. And Life Comes Back is a candle that will light your path.”
— Donald Miller, New York Times best-selling author of Blue Like Jazz
“Tricia Williford’s brave, exquisitely wrought book is an act of stunning generosity. It is a story of grief, yes, but also of how love, language, and work can give us back to ourselves, even after enormous loss, and can push us out of brutal darkness into the glorious, ordinary light of every day.”
— Marisa de los Santos, New York Times best-selling author of Belong to Me and Falling Together
In the course of twelve hours, our family of four became a trio, and since that day my boys and I have been creating a new life in an upside-down world.
I wrote this book, which in a lot of ways is a sequel to And Life Comes Back, to answer the question so many have asked: “And then what happened—after the crisis became reality and your life began again?” I’ve leaned into honest storytelling to offer a look into the chaos and beauty of who we have become.
Sometimes, you just have to pretend you know what you’re doing, pretend you’re brave enough, and pretend you can do this. Sometimes you just have to pretend you’re normal until the new normal finds you.
Praise for Let’s Pretend We’re Normal:
“I once complained I had no shoes until I met a man who had no feet.” Tricia Lott Williford’s story certainly helps to put my woes in perspective. A thirty-one widow with two preschoolers, she bravely tackles life’s everyday battles with God as her only Teammate. Near the beginning of this book, she states her modest goal for it: to tell some stories from her jouney as a mom. This is not a parenting book; it is a collection of survival tales. Like a young Chonda Pierce, Tricia shares her simple stories with a delightful sense of humor and keen observation. She says things like, “Preschool soccer teams look a whole lot like a litter of puppies toppling over one another to be the first one out of the cardboard box.” And, about firemen and paramedics, “I am seriously pretty sure handsome is in the job description.” Because of her mommy courage and determination to press on, the reader can’t help but to root for Tricia and her earnest faith.
- Peter Travis, Amazon review
