December 23, 2015

The Choice To Watch the Movie

The thing is, I’ve lived a very, very sad story for the last five years. I’m crying today because it’s still sad.

No matter what else is true, is coming true, will later be true, that story I lived is still true.

Five years later, it unfolds in movie scenes.  You know how it is... You watch a movie for an emotional experience. Romantic comedy, love story, suspense, drama, comedy, family classics. You decide what you’re in the mood for, and you commit to that experience.

Today, my mind plays the movie that always makes me cry. It’s the movie reel of the last five years. I could turn it off, look away, and barrel through this day with lists and tasks and traditions old and new.

Or, I could watch the movie.Projector Beam Of Light

A sign of true healing in the traumatized brain is when the ‘victim’ can relive the story with the awareness that the story happened, not that the story is still happening. It’s a very different process involving new neuropathways and memory files in the gigs of the brain. But when you can say, “Yes, it happened,” when you can recall the memories like a movie reel instead of an active, living trauma, then you can know your heart is healing.

There is tremendous beauty in watching those scenes, now from a distance.

I choose to watch the movie. It still makes me cry.

6 comments on “The Choice To Watch the Movie”

  1. I watched you at church tonight and my heart was filled with joy. Of course there were tears you shed as you remember this very day 5 years ago, however the happiness you radiated was simply contagious. As Phil stated, it's about from this day forward. Your future is so bright and I thank you for sharing your journey with the world. I love visually seeing love blossom in your heart again. Thank you.

  2. You may always need to keep the tissue box handy when you watch this particular movie, but being able to do it without feeling it's still an active, living trauma is a very good thing. Let the tears flow freely, and many hugs to you today, Tricia.

THIS BOOK IS FOR YOU

COMING AUGUST 2021
thisbookisforyouthumb

JUST. YOU. WAIT.

NOW AVAILABLE
Just-You-Wait-COVER-resized
#1 New Title on Amazon in Christian Inspiration

YOU CAN DO THIS

NOW AVAILABLE
you-can-do-this
#1 New Title on Amazon in Women's Issues!

LET'S PRETEND WE'RE NORMAL

NOW AVAILABLE
Lets-Pretend-Were-Normal
#1 Bestseller on Amazon in Single Parenting

AND LIFE COMES BACK

NOW AVAILABLE
and-life-comes-back
#1 in Denver Post: Nonfiction Paperback and Finalist for 2015 Christian Book Award
© 2015-2021 Tricia Lott Williford. All Rights Reserved. Site by Concept To Web.
crossmenu linkedin facebook pinterest youtube rss twitter instagram facebook-blank rss-blank linkedin-blank pinterest youtube twitter instagram
%d bloggers like this: