August 25, 2014

Sleeping Is Not What I am Doing

"Mommy, are you sleeping again?" Tucker asks.

Sleeping is not what I am doing, though it's not a far stretch. I rouse myself and lean onto one elbow to look at my son, to show him my eyes are open, I am aware, and he had better listen to my words.

"I am resting again, yes. And let me tell you why. When someone that I love is injured, or when one of my children needs to spend any time in the hospital, or when there is any emergency with my family, I am awesome. I will make decisions and think clearly and be so brave and strong and courageous. At the hospital, I fought for you, that you would Time To Recover - Clockbe protected with the medicine you needed. So now, I'm exhausted. It takes everything I have. I am glad to do it, and I always will, but then I need to rest for the next day or two. This is what I do."

"Okay, Mommy. You can rest." I think perhaps my answer was a little longer and more thorough than what he had hoped since he turned back to the TV like it was his saving grace. Having a rest when you are a mom can be a saving grace when you are exhausted, especially as most of the time you don't really get a chance, so when you actually do you want to make sure that is the best rest you can get. A soft mattress, fresh duvet, maybe even the Best bed frame from Sleepify or wherever you shop, so you can fall off into a deep slumber... until your kid wants to ask questions again!

That night, as we had a stay-at-home spaghetti dinner with my parents, my mom asked about our day.

Tyler said, "Mommy rested a lot."

"Yes, I rested a lot today. And do you remember why? Do you remember what I told you and Tucker? Because I would like to hear you say it so I know that you understand. What did I tell you?"

"Yes, I remember. It's what you do. You said, 'This is what I do.'"

This. Is Not. What I Said.

Yes, child. Please misquote me to school teachers, Sunday school teachers, therapists and school counselors alike: My mom sleeps. This is what she does.

3 comments on “Sleeping Is Not What I am Doing”

  1. Along the same vein - I'm a sahm, but watch 2 other boys (besides my own) as well. when my oldest was in preschool they were coloring paper cut outs representing family members and the teachers wrote on the backs what we do, per the kids. I go to the store.

  2. Mom was a school bus driver and was injured in a wreck when I was 9. I remember her being in traction, but I didn't know how to describe that to my teachers, so I told them that she was sleeping a lot. It was strange how much they knew about my Mom and understood, even when I didn't have a good understanding of what she did. Teachers know... And they understand.

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