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A Woman: To Lead or Not To Lead… and How?


I have been shamed. I’m only now realizing this.  I have been shamed by women for following the teachings of other women.

I’ve been encouraged to leadershipothink bigger, as if the women who champion today’s evangelical subculture aren’t thinkers.

It’s almost an anti-feminist movement, really.  These voices who have spoken into my life want so much more for women, so they ask me to stop thinking like one.  Kind of a miserable dichotomy.

I have heard, Break the mold, Tricia. Don’t step into the stereotype of the nice, kind, sweet homemaking Christian woman.  I have been challenged to think more, to defy all the definitions. As if women who are nice, kind, sweet, and (God bless them) homemaking aren’t thinking, aren’t authentic.

As if these women after God’s own heart are not deep thinkers.
As if they live inside definitions and stereotypes.  As if they are not real, true, authentic.

I am among the loudest to say that too often women’s ministry has been deduced to tea parties and fashion shows and pastel table cloths and potlucks and crafts.

Women are thinking. And we appreciate those who recognize us as thinkers.

As I study and learn and lean into this next chapter of my life, I find these shaming words in my head. The scorn. Shame. Against all things feminine. And I am confused, wondering if I am making decisions and shaping myself the way God wants me to, the way other leaders want me to, or if I am leaning away from what is before me because someone told me it’s simple thinking, less than, made for women.

I long to think on the thoughts you have for me. I long to live within your definition of me.
And Life Comes Back releases in a number of hours, and God I beg you to let this great wave carry the name of Jesus into the world. And as I ask you to bring yourself to the world, I bring myself to you.

Define me.

Tricia Lott Williford

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  1. Tricia, you have put into words what I have been feeling along the edges as i read numerous blogs. I am older than you, a grandma, 66years old…Today I spent a couple hours putting together valentine-love goodie bags for grandkids. and another 2 hrs, delivering one of them to some of said grandkids. the 2 1/2 year old cried when i went to leave and wanted me to put her to bed for her nap. I sang her to sleep. one other bag will be delivered by grandpa and one by the USPO! (Yep, I am late!)

    I’d say that is thinking big – building into t he next generation. Maybe “they” aren’t meaning to make this into an either/or, but I sure get what you are saying. It can feel like a lot of pressure. I read what you are doing with your precious two little boys and you, my friend, are thinking BIG! I will look forward to reading your book that will be published very soon.

  2. I find this fascinating. You put into words the unsettling thing I have been feeling as I read blogs. I am 66 years old. So at a different place in life. Today I drove valentine goodie bags to my grandchildren and spent some time loving on them. And sang the little one to sleep. Including prep time and delivering them took three hours.And that’s only one. Have to stop at post office for family# 2 and grandpa delivers the other one at a basketball game late this afternoon.

  3. Too much thinking, really.

  4. I can not to buy your back. When i read this blog my spirit immediately brought this book to mind “Lioness Arising” by Lisa Bevere. If you ever have a moment this may be a good one for you! Xxxx

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