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‘Tis a Fearful Thing

“Mommy, when you find my new daddy, I think you won’t be sad anymore.”

Well, my sweet child, I do understand what you mean and what you hope for.  Because you are too young to understand the complexities of love and healing and commitments and shared life, I simply smile and kiss you on your downy head.

The truth is, if and when the new daddy and I find each other, that’s a gift I intend to give him: he won’t have to fill a void.  It won’t be his task to replace what has been lost, to heal my heart, to create my joy.

There will be a new place that will be all his, and there will be new joy for our family to find together.

And sometimes, I’ll still cry.  And when I do, it will still be okay.

* * *

‘Tis a fearful thing
To love
What death can touch.
To love, to hope, to dream,
And oh, to lose.
A thing for fools, this,
Love,
But a holy thing,
To love what death can touch.

For your life has lived in me;
Your laugh once lifted me;
Your word was a gift to me.

To remember this brings painful joy.

‘Tis a human thing, love,
A holy thing,
To love
What death can touch.

~ Judah Halevi or Emanuel of Rome

12th Century

Tricia Lott Williford

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  1. Thank you for sharing your wisdom and for the quote about love. It reminds me of my grandparents and the love and life they shared for 60 years of marriage. My grandpa’s memorial service was this morning, so this is all fresh on my heart. I think of you and pray for you often, Tricia. God is doing a good and lasting work through your honesty and faith. Thank you!

  2. “It won’t be his task to replace what has been lost, to heal my heart, to create my joy.” These are some of the wisest words I think I’ve ever read.

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