I’ve often said that I believe hell will be a version of grocery shopping with small children. A closer degree to the epicenter will be shopping for school supplies. Combine the two, and I’m drawing near to Dante’s Inferno.
And the thing is, I love (love-love-love) school supplies. For crying out loud, I shop for them when I don’t need to. I may or may not have an excessive amount of sticky notes, pens, highlighters, and the like at my disposal.
It’s just that the school list is obscenely specific. Kindergarten students need some of the same items as first graders, some all together different items, and some same items in different quantities.
We were never actually able to find purple folders (extra sturdy without brads), 200-count Kleenex (I found 196), 60-count Post-It notes (I found 90), or a 2 GB jump drive (I found only 4 GB).
Meanwhile, my children were sneaking Hot Wheels into my cart or lifting the edge of my t-shirt as I reached for high shelves.
“Mommy, I just want to see the baby lines.” Those are stretchmarks. (And thank you for those, my son.)
Would you look at my kitchen?
On the ups, I found a great use for the IKEA bags I seem to collect on my every visit.
School supplies, I will love you more tomorrow than I love you today. We’ll once again strike up the love affair in no time at all. I’m sure of it.
Today, though, I need a little space.