Remember how I mentioned that ache in my ears from the shift in altitude, the airplane’s cabin pressure, and the mutual congestion the boys and I have been sharing?
I thought it would be smart to put a warm compress on it to help free things up in there. (Don’t worry. This won’t get gross. I won’t use words like Eustachian tubes and fluid.)
I opted for a standard remedy my grandma passed down: when somebody’s feeling achey, put a towel in the oven. In moments, you’ll have a versatile, warm compress.
Except I chose a washcloth in a hotel microwave.
Did you know hotel microwaves have a wattage of something like 75,000? One minute in there and I almost burned the whole place down.
What is that sweet, caramel scent? Oh, it’s the wash cloth. I caramelized it, apparently. I don’t really know how this happened. There’s something sugary in the fibers of that towel, that’s all I can say. It was smoking from the folds, and when I opened it (in full immersion in the sink), there was a dark brown hole right through the center of the towel.
Thankfully, the whole scene stopped just short of a fire alarm and hotel evacuation. That would have made for an entirely different blog post. Perhaps from jail.
I’m really living it up in Orlando. Wowsers. You can’t slow me down, folks.
I’m sorry – did you say something? I couldn’t hear you. My ears haven’t popped, you see.