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Black Lace


And so, I’m in Orlando.

(Not to be confused with Disney World, in case you talk to my children.  To be clear, “I wouldn’t go to Disney World without them.”  I merely came to visit Uncle Rob. In Florida.  Orlando, really.)

My plane landed and I bolted straight to a couple’s shower for my brother and his bride.  Since I am the Best Man in these upcoming nuptuals, I know I have important roles to play.  Standard protocol says I should buy cigars all around (I don’t know the first thing about this), or pay for a stripper (not on my dime, not in this lifetime), or at least buy something incredibly lovely for the bride to take on her honeymoon.

I opted for choice 3.  Shop for the bride? choose something personal and lovely?  This I can do.

(I’m making this sound like I did it all with such ease and intention.  Really, I didn’t know it was a co-ed bridal shower, I didn’t know my brother would open these gifts, let alone this black lacy number in front of his friends, and I didn’t know I’d be the only one who didn’t purchase items for their kitchen or bathroom.  But hey, it’s all in how you spin it.  I did it on purpose.  I’m the Best Man, after all.)

Sidenote.  When I purchased this black lacy item, I had two little boys with me.  (That’s all things fun and not awkward, let me tell you.)  As we checked out and left the store, alarms sounded from every angle.

“Ma’am, we’ll need to check your bags.”

My son had innocently picked up a shoplifting device off the ground, and he carried it out of the store.  Alarms and bells abounded.

Yes, please.  Check my bags.  I’m a widowed single mom shopping for unbelievably sexy things with my children in tow.  As I said, the whole experience was all things fun and not awkward.  Yep.

Anyway, the shower was great.  My gift made a splash, you could say.  (I would say.)

One other word about this.  You know what’s great?  A couple’s shower guest list compiled of artists, actors, singers, and dancers.  That’s a whole different party in all the best ways.  Quick wit and quips flying left and right.  The party is a stage and everybody shares the spotlight.

You’ve got to be on your toes to keep up with the musical theater jargon (I held my own), and you would simply have to be impressed with the impromptu performance of Trouble in River City (again, I held my own – who do you think was also in the car when my brother was learning every single word at age 7?).

We partied into the night with wine of every shade, punch with a strong spike, and rum in the cake.  I fell into bed in the early morning hours and slept until after lunch the next day.

Just kidding.  Partly kidding.

But, I drank water in the prettiest wine glass ever.  And I fell into bed with an ache in my ears from the shift in altitude and the head congestion my kids and I have been sharing.  And I slept half the day away because I’m a tired mom in a hotel room by myself.

But it sounded like I really partied, didn’t it?  For a little while there?

I did bring the best gift.  I’m pretty sure I covered that part.

Tricia Lott Williford

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  1. That’s great!! My Mom told me to buy something “scandalous”, like your lace number, and put it in a teapot or other household gift for a shower. I have yet to do that but have always wanted to. 🙂 I think you did bring the best gift!

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