skip to content

Let it Go. Feel Free.

“My wife and I were never able to have children,” he told me.  “But years ago, someone told us to focus on the things we had been able to do since we were without children.  Young Life, Youth for Christ – many kinds of youth ministry.  And if we had had children, we couldn’t have.”

His eyes looked like they wanted that paragraph to sound pretty and hopeful.

Like frosting over asphalt.

“And does that help you?  Does that help you to think on those things?” I asked.

His eyes softened and filled with tears, as if he hadn’t ever received permission to be honest about the emptiness in those words.  “It still hurts.”

“Then let go of those words.  Feel free.  If that concession encourages you, then lean into it and hold on with both hands.  But if it doesn’t, let go of it.  You don’t have to carry around an explanation to make it okay – not if it doesn’t make it okay.  Let go.”

* * *

“Sometimes those around us try to cheer us with platitudes.  These are galling.  We do not need people, in winter, telling us to buck up or snap out of it.  We do need people . . . but we mostly need their silence or their laughter, their willingness to stay with us in the darkness or their ability, sometimes, to distract us from it.  But their lectures and bromides are typically worse than useless.”

~ Mark Buchanan, Spiritual Rhythm

Tricia Lott Williford

Comments are closed

  1. Amen (to both)

  2. As a single person, I hear this bullcrap all the time. Not that I’m particularly heartbroken with being single, but when so many people assume you are and offer these very weird platitudes and/or solutions, you want to go buy a chainsaw. “Hi, not only are you not married and probably should feel depressed about this, here’s something unhelpful to think about!”

You Are Safe Now

Available April 9, 2024

This Book Is for You

Now Available
A book about falling in love with the Bible

Just. You. Wait.

Now Available
#1 New Title on Amazon in Christian Inspiration

You Can Do This

Now Available
#1 New Title on Amazon in Women's Issues!

Let's Pretend We're Normal

Now Available
#1 Bestseller on Amazon in Single Parenting

And Life Comes Back

Now Available
#1 in Denver Post: Nonfiction Paperback and Finalist for 2015 Christian Book Award
© 2015-2024 Tricia Lott Williford. All Rights Reserved. Site by Concept To Web.